THE START OF A PERFECTLY ADEQUATE RELATIONSHIP

Ned Reform, PhD Yale University 451 College St, Room 317 New Haven, CT 06511

Ms. Lindsay Troy PRIME Headquarters 3993 Howard Hughes Parkway, 8th Floor Las Vegas, NV 89169

My dearest Miss Troy,

No, your eyes do not deceive you. It is I! Your old friendly rival, Dr. Ned Reform. Oh yes - I know we’ve had our differences. Me with my resentment of your wanton disregard for even the basics of human decency and your misguided frustration due to your thinly veiled attraction to me. But I am confident we can put all that unpleasantness behind us, for you see - I seek to, as the popular colloquialism goes, “do business.”

I write to you today in regards to PRIME. I am pleased to see that it is still going - and touring the world no less! Incredibly impressive. I certainly lost my bet to Mr. Cole that you wouldn’t be able to keep a business afloat for longer than a year. But I am pleased to be wrong!

Before you ask, no: I am not seeking to return to PRIME as an active competitor. While I have many fond - well, perhaps “relatively mundane” is the better descriptor - memories from previous run there, I am far too busy with my course load and my many responsibilities as the greatest DEFIANCE Southern Heritage Champion of all time to devote any time to in-ring competition anywhere else.

Also, I don’t want to.

No, I will not be gracing you or your merry band of PRIME-ates with my wrestling prowess - but I bring you the next best thing. For I, Doctor Ned Reform, have found the future of professional wrestling.

I fully intend to titillate your imagination without going into great detail. A fine rhetorical anticipation builder to employ in the circus that is professional wrestling, yes? But I will say this - I have had the fortune of stumbling upon two young men who I fully intend will be the biggest stars in the industry within three years. I hope you can sense the urgency in my writing and I assure you I employ ZERO hyperbole. I also hope you are above accusing me of petty deception. I have never lied to you, Ms. Troy, only presented some rather unpleasant truths.

If you haven’t come to this rather obvious conclusion yet, allow me to say it outright: I represent these two budding superstars. They have wisely entrusted their blossoming career to me, and I have likewise wisely chosen to give you the first chance at securing the future. I could have taken them to any number of wrestling organizations, but I chose PRIME. You are, I assume, sufficiently honored.

That is all for now. While I know being swift is growing increasingly difficult in your advanced age, I trust you’ll want to move quickly on the matter. Please reach out to Delilah Sanders when you return from overseas and I’d be happy to meet you to discuss further. Lunch, it should go without saying, is on you. I am bolstering your roster - a meal is the smallest gesture of kindness you could show me.

I appreciate your time, and please do hesitate to reach out with any minor inquiries. I am a very busy man.

All the best, Ned Reform, PhD DEFIANCE Southern Heritage Champion