Please Don't Say It

She gazed across the booth at him; the hard, but handsome features in his face. The wild jet black mane that covered his head. Muscles like concrete, concealed beneath a cotton T-shirt. Sid Phillips could always draw eyes to him, no matter where he went. It was the rainbow colored eyes of RIA that were transfixed on his image currently.

The couple sat in a Spanish restaurant located in Barcelona. Which one exactly wasn't important. There were matters of greater significance at hand. His tone when he asked her out, his present body language, there was clearly something weighing heavy on the shoulders of the man who could powerbomb a galaxy.

“Soooo…” RIA began in unease. “I know you well enough to know when something's bothering you. I told you I want you to talk to me when that's the case. So spill, babe! What's wrong?”

He glanced down at the menu, no actual attempt at reading the words beneath the glossy laminate. His eyes slowly traveled back up to her. Like most things with Sid, his sigh was heavy.

He set the menu down and tried to meet Ria’s eyes, “I’m halfway across the world, not knowing what I’m doing in PRIME any more. Most people I know would yearn to be in Barcelona or Paris, but… I dunno. Feels confining, like I can’t fully enjoy being here. And meanwhile, Joe is… well, Joe. Insufferable at the best of times, unbearable at the worst.”

He paused to look up at the ceiling before returning to Ria’s gaze, “I don’t have that insane drive that people have for this. Every time Coral or Cecilworth would try to teach me something, I… Well, it didn’t work out.”

Because powerbombs.

“So I’ve thought about it a lot on the flights back and forth from Phoenix to Europe, and… I think I’m just done. With PRIME. Wrestling in general, too.“

Silence. RIA nodded while looking down, piecing everything together in her head. Those last lines really did a number on her thought process.

“So you’re quitting?” She asked, volume a crank or two above a whisper. “You're leaving? What are you gonna do? Like, I'm not gonna try to talk you out of it if you're unhappy. I'm just…”

There's an obvious gloom surrounding the former Lockhart. She raised her head to lock eyes with Sid once more.

“I'm pretty all in on wrestling. Maybe that'll change at some point in the future, but for now? This is my life. PRIME, SHOOT, whatever else comes up… I don't see that changing any time soon.”

“Well, this is going to sound out of nowhere, but I’m going to talk to Avalon. See what he says about my path forward too. But I’m thinking that I’ll ask for my release, finally go to college, and… I dunno, get into architecture. Joe’s dad runs a carpentry company in Phoenix, always kinda enjoyed working with him when I was in high school. Let me learn how to drive all of the heavy machinery and everything.”

Sid shrugged his big, meaty shoulders, “I figured that my scholarship’s no good any more, don’t know how those work to be honest, but I’ve kept enough money from wrestling in PRIME that I can just… I dunno, go.”

“Well first of all, I'm glad you're reaching out to him. I know I've said you should in the past.” RIA said. “Now, if that's what you wanna do, I think you should! It's better to go for something you're passionate about instead of wasting time where you're unhappy. That said…”

She started ringing her hands. Again, she struggled to look up at her boyfriend. Her discomfort, perhaps even dread, couldn't be more obvious.

“What does that mean for us? Where do we go?”

“I…”

Sid hesitated, and looked down at his hands.

“...I don’t know, Ria.”

He can barely look up to face her.

“My dad… used to talk about how wrestlers live in their own little world, insulated from the ‘real world’. I never… really put thought into that until lately. Once I ask for my release… Well, we’d have to keep things long-distance if we stuck together, and… I don’t know how much either of us want to do that.”

She couldn't help but deflate a bit, despite her best attempts to hide it. It made sense. RIA knew Sid had a point. That didn't mean she just had to accept it, however.

“But… But what if we tried it to see how it would work? Maybe it wouldn't be so bad? Like, I could fly out to see you in between PRIME and SHOOT shows! I could-”

Sid waved his hand.

“Ria, I don’t think it’ll work. My dad used to tell me that wrestlers end up living in their own bubble, insulated from what he called ‘the real world’. My dad used to tell us that before my mom passed away, they didn’t exactly have a great relationship because he was never home… and when he was, wrestling was all he really talked about. And I fear that might happen to us.”

She didn't like that he was right. She hated that he was right. Did they have moments without wrestling being the topic of conversation? Of course. But did it come up more than it should? Yes. She didn't want that to be true, but there it was.

“I guess that's it, then.” RIA moped. “I know you're right… And honestly, it might be for the best… You deserve better. Someone that isn't damaged goods. But I guess, if nothing else, we'll always have our first date. I still think about that, you know? You looked so handsome, even if you couldn't get that tie on…”

A forlorn sigh.

“I remember how you stood up for me when that waiter was being a dick. I guess that's why the whole Glueminati thing bothered me… Cuz in my opinion, that's not you. I guess when I really think about it, it makes sense that would be the case for wrestling in general.”

“Just another thing Joe dragged me into. Luna - that’s my sister - always said that she hated how much I’d follow him around to keep him out of trouble,” Sid said. After a beat, he added, “If it’s any consolation, you’re one of the few highlights I’ve had of my time around here.”

RIA glanced back up. She wanted to smile, even a forced one, but the weight on her heart wouldn't allow it. She took one last, long look at Sid.

“Can I have one last kiss?” She asked, just short of pleading. Sid simply nodded. The two leaned over the table, their lips meeting tenderly for the final time.

“Goodbye, Ria.” Sid said as about as gently as he was capable of. He got up from the table slowly and began to walk away. He paused, turning around to give one more awkward wave, one that RIA returned half-heartedly. She watched him walk out the door.

There she sat, alone once again. Her forearms folded on the table in front of her while she stared down. It took a moment, but she soon lowered her head, hiding her face in her folded arms. Her body shook. She could feel the saturation from her eyes coating her appendages. RIA couldn't contain the guttural wailt hat escaped from her lungs. So much for being on top of the world.